No time to wait for the gold

Susan Sejeong Kim
Contributor
Mary El’Bably moved to Canada from Egypt at age 12 with her older sister and Canadian mother, who had recently separated from her husband.
Ten years later, El’Bably found herself in the same place her mother had been: she was a single parent who had just broken out of an unhealthy relationship, and she faced an uncertain future. Confronted by a harsh reality and difficult circumstances, she did what she calls the “natural thing” to do: she pursued an education.

Today, El’Bably, 26, is a proud third-year sociology student at York University; founder and president of the Student Association for Single Parents (sasp); career day director for the Sociology Undergraduate Student Association (susa); and a member of the exclusive Golden Key International Honour Society, made up of the top 15 percent of post-secondary students worldwide.
El’Bably spends her spare time as a mentor, class representative and part-time employee at the Scott Library. She has also just finished sending out multiple applications for law school.
By day, she is a student, president and volunteer; by night, she is the loving mother of six-year-old Jada. Despite her busy schedule, she ensures her daughter takes piano and swimming lessons and gets lots of “Jada and mommy time.”
Mary’s older sister Assmaa, who is also a working parent, wonders how Mary handles her busy schedule so wonderfully.
“I don’t know how she does it,” laughs Assmaa. “She’s always so busy, but I’m not worried.” Mary is a passionate and determined person, says Assmaa, and she works to improve the lives of others, as well as her own.
Now that she’s juggling being a mother, student and community leader, El’Bably finds it difficult to imagine her busy, well-rounded life could ever have been different; however, she serenely admits there was a time when she had no clear goals for the future. El’Bably moved away from home after high school, and, still a teenager, jumped through a series of part-time jobs. Then she had Jada, and everything changed.
“I wanted to be a proud mother,” explains El’Bably. Goal set, she did not stay idle. El’Bably applied to university, and once accepted to York, got involved in volunteer activities right away.
Pursuing education as a single parent proved difficult, so El’Bably formed Student Association for Single Parents, an organization dedicated to providing textbooks, counselling, academic aid, toys and clothing for single parents at York.
Steven Valentini, president of susa, helped found the group and continues to support it. When El’Bably found it hard to get recognition and support for the club, he agreed to share an office with the busy, ambitious sasp president. El’Bably admits she will feel a twinge of pain leaving that office and handing the group – her “child” – to someone else when she graduates.
After graduation, El’Bably can imagine nothing better than being accepted into York’s own Osgoode Hall Law School. Although she is a won’t-take-no-for-an-answer person, she does have plan B: a sociology professorship.
“Everyone has plans A and B. I have plans A to Z,” says El’Bably. “Yes, you want plan A. Everyone wants plan A – who doesn’t?” She knows, however, that life is not always compliant. “That doesn’t mean you should give up. I believe I can fight for what I want, but if it’s not meant to be, then there must be something else that is meant to be.”
“It’s up to me to find it,” she smiles. Life does not hand out gold to those who lay idle, but as in Mary’s case, it does offer success to those who truly look for it.
For more information visit www.yorku.ca/sasp