Is this really “the most wonderful time of the year?”

 

Victoria Strassler | Copy Editor

Featured image courtesy of Pixabay


The holiday season can be far from winter nights sitting by the fireplace sipping hot cocoa. Whether you celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, a medley of holidays or none at all, December is often regarded as the “ideal” time of the year. It is a month typically free from university classes and full of non-stop gift-giving and quality time with family and friends.

However, for some, this period is far from being “the most wonderful time of the year” – but why is that? Why is this time of year, synonymous in society with glee and relaxation, often not experienced by many in such a joyous way?

Some may categorize themselves as having the “holiday blues” during the holiday season.

According to Gordan Flett, Personality & Health professor, the holiday blues is “the idea that a substantial proportion of people feel sad and depressed during the holidays. It also suggests someone who is quite lonely and isolated from others.”

Woo Kim, International Student & Scholar Services associate director at York, says the holiday blues may be experienced for various reasons for some international students in particular.

Kim describes that an international student may be in a mundane mood because “they may not be going home over the December holidays and won’t get to see their family and friends. This may lead to feelings of isolation and loneliness, at least temporarily.”

Aparna Mehta, third-year English student at York, explains how she was impacted during the past holiday season when she was unable to visit her family in Delhi, India.

“The holiday season tends to be a time for family. As I was unable to travel back home and be with my family last year, I did feel a little unhappy and homesick.”

Kim also explains how “for other students, this may be their first, or one of their first, winter. If they’re from a country where the weather stays fairly mild or hot in winter and stays sunny, the early darkness and grey winter days may cause them to feel less energized and ‘blue.’”

Sarah Irwin-Gardner, York’s Graduate Student Wellness Services manager, lists some factors that generally may impact students’ well-being during the holiday season. One factor Irwin-Gardner mentions is “feeling pressure to produce or experience a ‘perfect’ holiday.” Cassandra Carcasole, third-year English student, describes how she feels this expectation Irwin-Gardner describes.

 The holidays do cause some stress for me because there are so many things on my mind. I also feel like I need to buy everyone the perfect gift, so there’s always some pressure there,” Carcasole says.

Brian Villa, third-year Business Administration student, also has experienced this type of pressure. “My stress derives more from what to do on Christmas so that everyone will be happy.”

Irwin-Gardner discusses how the holiday season may affect a student because they tend to “manage multiple demands on one’s time.” Such demands may include balancing time for holiday shopping and social gatherings with time for final exam and assignment preparation, on top of working a part-time job.

“Other than being a student, I work two part-time retail jobs. Right now, it’s definitely a lot. I don’t have any days off,” Carcasole says.

“I am able to balance holiday preparations and celebrations with other commitments, but it is not easy and definitely not the ideal situation.” Villa adds.

Charles Matthew Mishiyev, second-year history student, explains how becoming accustomed to a hectic routine is his key to balancing a hectic season.

“I am somewhat able to balance holiday preparations and celebrations with other commitments because I have worked in retail during the holiday season for two years and have adapted to it,” Mishiyev says.

Adelaide Dolha, third-year Devised Theatre student, recalls her experience working in retail during the holiday season.

“Last year when I worked in retail, I had more hours due to more people being needed and these were 5 a.m. shifts. I even had one on Christmas Eve which made me tired for the rest of the day.”

Another factor Irwin-Gardner adds to the list of potential reasons for stress during the holidays is an “increase in academic pressure and the effects of working intensely leading up to the holidays.”

“I am able to balance my schedule as I usually start preparing for the holidays only once exams are done,” Dolha adds.

Irwin-Gardner also lists “feelings of isolation or feelings of loneliness” as a contributing factor for one’s holiday blues. Silsila Bahrami, fourth-year communication studies student, shares her feelings of discontentment with this time of year.

“I do not typically enjoy the holiday season. I am not a fan of the cold weather and I usually feel left out of the festivities, as my family does not celebrate the holiday season. I try to keep myself busy during this time period, but it is difficult when most people are away and/or celebrating while I am at home.”

Other factors listed by Irwin-Gardner include: “Distance from loved ones; increased financial demands/pressures; change in routine; missing loved ones who are far away or no longer alive; seasonal effects on mood (SAD), and difficult or distressing family dynamics.”

If you feel as if you may have experienced, or are currently experiencing, the holiday blues, there are other students at York, and in the country, who share your discontentment. But, how many students do the holiday blues impact?

Unfortunately, there has not been any research conducted that has established a relationship between the holiday season and an increase in stress and unhappiness among students, according to Flett. Nonetheless, there are still students who may feel a sense of unhappiness at one point during the holiday season due to the aforementioned potential factors.

 I look at the holidays as a time for relaxation and enjoyment for some people, but potentially hellish for others. It is a difficult time for any student who is preoccupied mentally and emotionally with not having done well in the fall term or who is returning to a less than optimal interpersonal situation or who is just feeling isolated and lonely,” Flett explains.

Flett also further supports the factors listed by Irwin-Gardner as to what could contribute to the holiday blues.

“It is more stressful for those who are focused on happier times in the past and why aren’t they so happy now. Or, for someone who is overly focused on comparing their holiday experience to the idealized accounts of life over the holidays provided by other people. Also, some people really buy into the notion of the perfect holiday season and they can exhaust themselves and others by trying to live up to an idealized image of how it should be or could be. Others are disquieted because they are so work-obsessed, they don’t know how to respond during times when the focus should be on rest and replenishing oneself.”

Louise Hartley, York’s Psychology Clinic director, comments on how marketing is also a contributing factor for those experiencing the holiday blues. Marketing has surrounded us with a narrative of how the holidays “should be,” despite it being unattainable for some.

“The holiday season can be difficult for anyone because there are these expectations built in through the excessive advertising – that this is a ‘happy’ time of year.”

So, how can one cope with the holiday blues?

Mayo Clinic shared 10 tips to coping with stress and depression during the holidays. The Mayo Clinic staff recommended that if you are experiencing the holiday blues for any of the aforementioned reasons, you should try to do the following: “acknowledge your feelings; reach out; be realistic; set aside differences; stick to a budget; plan ahead; learn to say no; do not abandon healthy habits; take a breather, and seek professional help if you need it.”

If you often feel lonely during the holiday season or you feel yourself feeling in such a way in the next few weeks, registered psychologist, Dr. Ganz Ferrance explained to CTV News that “if you are isolated from your family, find other ways to connect with people. Make time for friends or volunteering to help combat loneliness.”

Kim provides information on how York students will be able to connect with other students staying in the city to avoid feelings of isolation or loneliness this holiday season.

“International students who aren’t going home and staying in Toronto may want to connect with other international students staying over the break or with domestic students who live locally. This year, York International will be running a few events and outings in the city for any international students staying in Toronto so they can connect with other students staying over the break.”

The Mayo Clinic staff put it best: “Don’t let the holidays become something you dread. Instead, take steps to prevent the stress and depression that can descend during the holidays. Learn to recognize your holiday triggers, such as financial pressures or personal demands, so you can combat them before they lead to a meltdown. With a little planning and some positive thinking, you can find peace and joy during the holidays.”

It is very important to reach out for support if you have concerns about your mental health or wellness during the holiday season or at any point during the year. York University’s Student Counselling & Development Services offers walk-in counselling Monday to Friday between 9:00 a.m. to 3:00 p.m. More information can be found at counselling.students.yorku.ca

The Good2Talk Helpline is a free, confidential helpline for post-secondary students in Ontario that is available 24/7 as well.

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